Meet Vegas. This was him when he was a puppy. He is a 100% purebred GolShepPoint. Okay, I made that up. If they can make a Labradoodle, then why can't I? He is part Golden Retriever, part German Shepherd, part Pointer, and part Grouchy Old Man.
Adorable, huh. That was a long time ago. Let's just say that now he would get the senior discount at IGA. How old is he? He is almost 14 years old. In dog years that would put him somewhere between . . .
Abe Vigoda (from Barney Miller) and . . .
Noah (from the Ark).
He has had ACL tears in both back legs and one twice. I refer to him as my bionic dog. *Side note to Hollywood-You have remade every other freakin cheesy show and movie from my childhood, so did you forget about the Six Million Dollar Man? Just sayin'.* Back to the story. If you knew Vegas at that time of his life, you may have seen him like this.
If you did see him like this, then you were probably, inevitably "coned" at some point. That is where he drives the cone into the back of your knee causing it to buckle (like we used to purposely do to each other in grade school). Now, Vegas in his old age has picked up some funny quirks. A few months ago, he started killing bugs and leaving them outside my daughter's bedroom door. I guess he needed a new job skill for his resume other than "lay on ass all day". Most importantly is that he has claimed a new bedroom. Now mind you that he has a fairly new and fluffy bed down in the family room where he used to sleep.
But where does he choose to lay?
It seems he has found the coldest register in the house. It is directly over the blower on the furnace and the closest to the central air unit. This wouldn't be a problem but his new room is also . . .
THE MAIN BATHROOM! So out of pity, there is a lot of "going with the door open" (even a friend or 2 have resorted to this). You get used to the sound. When you do go, you get this look.
You know he's saying, "I don't shit in your bedroom. Why are you shitting in mine?" If you are able to actually get him up and out of the bathroom for you to do your business, this is what you can expect the moment you open the door.
I swear, the next time I am at a hotel, I am stealing him a "Do Not Disturb" sign for his door.