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Wednesday, February 29, 2012

The Great Pumpkin Bar Fiasco

LIES, LIES, LIES!  What do you do when an adult authority figure in the house (in this case, the mother) that is supposed to be teaching their children not to lie insists on perpetuating a never-ending lie herself.  Let me back up.  A couple of Christmases ago, the kids begged their mother to make pumpkin bars.  You know the kind with gobs of white cream cheese frosting slathered on top.  For weeks, we were met with empty promises.  The begging continued until she finally made them.  At this point, however, the kitchen looked like the dessert bar at Golden Corral due to it now being a week before Christmas.


It didn't look anything like this however when we were first promised the pumpkin bars.  Nevertheless, she made them and we ate them and ate them.  After a few days, there was a tiny sliver of a bar left that had gotten hard from not being covered and had to be thrown away.

Now to her version of events.  She falsely claims that no one ate the pumpkin bars so she wasn't making them anymore.  The kids and I know the truth that there was a tiny sliver left and that if she hadn't waited until the house was full of sweets to make them, there wouldn't have even been that left.  So, if this story ever comes up in your presence, nod and wink at me because you know the truth.  Well, we evidently all whined enough about her fabricated story to where she relented and we were met with a plate of pumpkin bars on the counter one night.


The kids all ate one and then had big plans on having them for breakfast, too.  Morning came, the alarms sounded and the kids all came running for the kitchen to claim the big pumpkin bar prize.


And were met with . . . 


DENIED!  That cruel woman had taken them ALL to work for a food day.  I am not exaggerating when I say that the kids looked like whipped pups.
We pictured her sitting in her cubicle throwing away her half uneaten pumpkin bar and laughing like Vincent Price. 




There was no doubt she was getting even for us leaving a fragment of a piece of a pumpkin bar from before.  So, all of you readers need to take up the cause and let Andi know of her unjust, unfounded ways and let's all join together in a unified front to demand that she make her children (and husband) pumpkin bars.  After all, we don't want this to escalate into something bigger.  We all remember how the great Prussian Pumpkin Bar War of 1741 turned out, now don't we?  


VIVA LA PUMPKIN BARS!




16 comments:

  1. I'm the liar? Psh-shaw! There are two sides to EVERY story my dear. :) Love you!

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  2. I've got Andi's back on this one - maybe I'm just bitter because my kids BEGGED me to make brownies last week, they each ate 2 total. I CAN NOT have a 1/2 pan of brownies sitting on the counter (unless I want to break out my fatter jeans)

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  3. That is true. There are 2 sides. There's YOUR side. . . and then there's THE TRUTH! The kids, Vincent Price, and I stand by my story. XOXO

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  4. 'Atta girl, Kristi. You're taking the RIGHT side. The TRUTHFUL version . . . mine! :)

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  5. Why can't any of the other four of you just follow the recipe and make a batch yourself? They could have been done in the time this blog was created. Step up, be a real man--make pumpkin bars! :o)

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    1. Heck yeah, Sarah Lynn O! They should have all been enrolled in 4-H like we were. Then they would have the SKILLS to make 'em themselves. :)

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  6. Not same. Snort. Momma cook wit love. Ogg cook wit fire. You know dat. Grunt.

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    1. Learn proper English my dear Caveman! Ha ha! While fire helped industrialize the world (according to the cool ride in the big golf ball at Disney's Epcot that is . . . ), fire's "got" NOTHING compared to the Women's Lib movement, which is industrializing 1/2 of the human race --commonly known as the MALE SPECIES! (In other words . . . LEARN TO BAKE DEAR HUSBAND :) XOXOXOX

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    2. Looks like you payed attention in the big ball. I don't believe you can say the same about the Hall of Presidents. I think the Obama robot saw your sleep drool.

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  7. I never noticed how much Andi's laugh does sound like Vincent Price's and to laugh at her own families misfortune...while at work even..is just too despicable to comment on. Anyway, you're always welcome to visit us anytime you want to head over to knoxville, bu tof course you will have to bring pumpkin bars. No silly, I dont care if they will be a lil off the season over the summer. I want pumpkin bars as much as your family. Please don't lie to me either like you did to your spouse. I'd hate to half to defriend you from facebook. : (

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    Replies
    1. Be careful Dave. She may PROMISE you the bars and not deliver. Just sayin' don't get yer hopes up.

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  8. Daddys telling the truth.
    -Callahan

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  9. Cmon mom, we all know your just covering up. About everyone in the town of clinton and beyond has heard the sides from both of us, and most of them believe us because you twist the story to make it look like your poor inocent kids fault...oh and your studly husbands fault too.

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    Replies
    1. Straight from the mouths of babes. And we all know kids always tell nothing but the truth 100% of the time.

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  10. Dad she is threatening me saying she wont make me any fried pb sandwitches if I don't tell the true story!!!! D:

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  11. But you have told the TRUE story. You mean she is wanting you to LIE! I never thought she would stoop to blackmailery. The scoundrel.

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