My Blog List

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

YA' HUNGRY? GRAB YER FEED BAG AND HEAD ON DOWN TO . . .



That's right.  America's first no frills nugget restaurant.  We offer NO seating, NO condiments, NO furnace, NO air conditioning, NO pest control, and NO containers of any kind.  We do this to pass those savings on to you.  So if you don't want to walk around with cupped hands full of nuggets, know that I wasn't just blowin' smoke about bringing that feed bag.  All of our chickens are guaranteed to be crammed into the tiniest cages possible with only their closest friends so you know that they are happy.  Our executive chef "Skeeter" has over 20 years experience on kitchen duty at Chez San Quentin where he was known for his passionate shiv work 


Ask for French fries and after telling you to "F**K OFF", our counter guy might just tell you to go to France to have someone point you to England to then ask for "chips".   All he needs to know from you is how many scoops and when he gets through scratchin' his back with the scooper, he'll be glad to get 'em fer ya.  Just a word of warnin'.  Too much extra chatter just pisses him off and you may get bitten on the torso or at the very least get a little "special sauce" on your nuggets.  

Looking for something to dip your nuggets in?  Maybe you should try a NUTTIN' BUT BBQ SAUCE store because we got NUTTIN' BUT NUGGETS® DAMMIT, we already told you 3 friggin' times.  However, we do sometimes allow our buddy "Scabpick" to park his cheese wagon out front.  If you hit it on the right day, he'll be glad to put a shovel full of cheese on yer nuggets fer a small fee.  Might wanna remind him to hose the hog manure off his shovel first.


Here's his rates, but sometimes if he ain't ate that day, you can just trade him half yer roadkill.


No comments:

Post a Comment